Lowmein Lowdown: Beijing-a-ding-ding

10 Days in Beijing; with Ted in lectures and business trips, I was picturing my time there to be much like Scarlett Johannsen's in "Lost In Translation"--wandering about in awe, exploring the city, finding a little restaurant I would frequent, and giving a 5 star karaoke performance.

The only thing that came to fruition was the karaoke.

Beijing is not easy to get around peeps. NO ONE speaks English (which came as a shock after 3 spoiled weeks in Hong Kong), not even the cabbies could understand an address written in chinese by the hotel concierge. Getting anywhere is extremely difficult and being with someone who is fluent is crucial. While Ted has a few phrases mastered, they didn't really get us anywhere.

(Sidenote on learning the language, to give an idea of difficulty: compared with our 26 characters, Chinese has 20,000, along with 9 intonations that can change the meaning of the word, so if your pronounce it the wrong way, you change the meaning.)

The feeling that I got ripped off--multiple times--is strong to quite strong.

A Beijing tradition: Hot Pot. Basically the Chinese equivalent to fondue, with food cooked in seasoned broth instead of oil. There was everything from carpaccio to fish balls (a favorite around here) to a whole egg. I took one for the team in the dumb american department when i boiled my whole egg instead of cracking it in the broth.

We stayed at the Commune by the Great Wall--check it out! www.communebythegreatwall.com

Highly recommend it!

The section of the Great Wall that we hiked close to Badaling but avoided the tourist area

Lots of comments on this hat...good news, it could be yours, for the right price. I will warn you in advance that our haggling skills have quite improved since being here, so it will take a brave one to step to this...

Pictures don't do justice!

Ted at the infamous Silk Market. It is here that every major brand is knocked off, highly illegal, but one of the biggest tourist draws. Some of the guys on Ted's program told us that you should ask for and not pay more than 10% of their asking price for anything. It was pretty exhausting--not just the haggling, but making your way through the hundreds of aisles (there are 7 floors) getting grabbed and yelled at--"Hey lay-deeee I tink I know you" and "SHHHHH, come hee and I give you seec-wet pwice"

Ted had a suit made, which turned out great, and I battled it out with a young girl for some fake Uggs (I had to have them for the wall Lindsay, I can hear you gasping now). I finally had to leave it to Ted when she started calling us crazy and accused us of lying about other prices. Apparently, the go-to move for selling fake Uggs is pinching a piece of the "real" sheep's wool from the inside of the boot and burning it with a lighter so you can smell that it is authentic... real or fake, didn't smell so sweet.

Made our way out after getting the fakes for $350 yuan (about $35) which was still too much, but starting price was $2300. Just a heads up to booth 108, the "Burberry plaid" shouldn't accompany the Max Mara label

Don't think I need to explain this one

This is a motorcycle with a metal cab covering the bike--fun little ride--there were even curtains in the back, bless him. Really trying to set himself apart with some ambiance.

Ted eating a self-heating meal....questionable? I thought so

Here I am, at the Forbidden City, diving into the mass of people, trying to bump up to the front row of the rail guarding the throne at the Hall of Supreme Harmony (where the Emperors were crowned--anyone seen The Last Emperor? All filmed here) I'm usually not one to feel the need to edge my way to the front, but it kind of becomes a competition when you've been pushed around long enough. About half way through the pack I decide there's no way I can get to the front without losing an arm, so I just hold the camera over my head (Bonks style) and try to shoot a quick photo--only mid-capture, I got taken down by the tour group to my right--you get the idea from the slant of the photo.

The enormity of the Forbidden City is mind boggling--we were here for three and half hours and saw only the major points of interest--some people dedicate a full day and still don't squeeze it all in. The walls are 30 feet tall, the enclosed city itself is about 960 yards long and 750 yards wide (so even bigger than Andrew and Allison's wedding), and 90 courtyards. Wasn't open to the public until 1925 when the last dynasty fell.

Entering the Forbidden City, you see behind Ted a huge portrait of Chairman Mao. It is amazing to me that he is revered and worshipped here the way he is, being responsible for an estimated 70 million deaths during his rule in China--portraits, dollar bills, his picture is everywhere. Guess you have to pretend to love him even if you don't--we learned that it was just before the '08 Beijing games that a student was released from prison after 18 years for throwing a paint bomb at his portrait...titch extreme.

Across the street you have Tiananmen Square, scene of the "June 4th Incident" as they call it here, referring to the massacre of peaceful protesting students in 1989 (i can't believe I don't remember it happening). I don't want to bust out into a history lesson here (I have learned so much from the book you gave us Kristy, thank you!) there is obviously tons to read and see about it on google/you tube...that is, if you aren't in Beijing.

In Beijing the government has banned access to anything published about the issue, and continues to downplay it--the government ignores that it ever happened, people speak of it cautiously, and memorials are not allowed. What is really amazing to me is that it is impossible to find any information or coverage of the incident if you google from there--and they JUST lifted a ban on wikipedia. Crazy/scary/communists!

Just one little fact that I have to share: according the the government 200-300 people were killed at Tiananmen Square while the red cross reports 3000-4000...

The local hip hop bar

Please read the center work "ethic"

This was a wall at one of the most successful companies in China, Hui Yuan, a juice company that just sold to Coca-Cola.

This was great Chinese Food at Da Dong, noted for Peking Duck. Steered clear of the pigeon.

The Beijing Opera House--referred to as the Egg--you can see why, with the reflection in the surrounding pond--beautiful!

First karaoke--called KTV here (they hate anything japanese, so the name had to be changed).

I love KTV for many reasons:

You have your own private room
They supply tambourines, moroccas, and mini stage
KTV reminds me of DTV, the dance tv station from Girls Just Want to Have Fun
The songs that are offered in English are hilarious and random--this is Ted with our friends Eva and Salvadore doing "Hotel California"--worst karaoke pick of all time, but they do love a good ballad here, and they REALLY want you to sing it well. Personally, I think they need a little dose of Tone & Matthilda's "Islands In the Stream"

First taste of Peking Duck--really good! That's the head off to the side, which does make its way onto the serving plate--you know, they're all about presentation!

Just a LITTLE bit of a smog problem...

This is 2 pm in the afternoon at the Olympic Village, they have obviously really let themselves go after the summer games. I think it is partly carbon emisions, partly human burping emissions--lots of belching going on here, nothing to be ashamed of--can be within inches of your face on the subway, not a big deal. Some nasty stats on the cleanliness of Beijing:

If the particulate in the air (hang with me here, this is the amount of toxins per square meter) in the US reaches 50, there is a warning that goes out for children and seniors. At any given time here, it's at 140.
China makes up 1/3 of the entire world's smoking population--which along with the smog, leads to a lot of people hacking up their lungs--which means the noise or sight of someone hawking a loogee (I almost got hit by one!) is about 1 every 3 minutes. For real ya'll.
Children can and will use the bathroom on the side of the street or in public ashtrays (ok, I didn't see that, but I read it)
Ladies toilets are porcelain holes in the ground--with TP disposed of in little bins right there next to you--forgive me if that's TMI, but I'm still a little scarred from a few!